More Sense Than Humor

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Tommo
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Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2007 3:19 am
Location: Fairfax, VA

More Sense Than Humor

Post by Tommo » Fri Sep 28, 2018 1:04 pm

CALIFORNIA:

Governor Jerry Brown of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor's dog, then bites Governor Moonbeam.

The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie "Bambi" and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.

He calls Animal Control. Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it.

He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.

The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged.

The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals.

The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a "coyote awareness program" for residents of the area.

The State Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.

The Governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The State spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training regarding the nature of coyotes.

PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million suit against the State & The Lord of the Flies.

TEXAS:

The Governor of Texas is traveling in his wheelchair with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks his dog.

The Governor Abbot shoots the coyote with his legally concealed carry pistol and takes his dog to he Veterinarian.

The Governor has spent $0.50 on a .45 hollow point cartridge.

Buzzards eat the dead coyote.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.

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